Arrogance Control

13 Feb

It’s human nature…unless we’re consciously aware, we’ve carefully removed our blinders and slipped on our ultra-sheek x-ray vision glasses, and are prepared to sit down for the full viewing of how wrong we really are, we believe we’re right. Most of the time.
It’s called confirmation bias. We’ll look for, search for, be more vigilant in noticing those things that confirm what we believe to be true.  If we’re experiencing dissonance, guess what our next step is? Get someone to let us know that what we did is all right.  Find the research to confirm that we made the best decision. But never ever look for evidence that we stepped the wrong way, should have considered an alternative direction, or not have made such an impulsive decision.
Example: a friend of mine has moved in with her boyfriend. He had asked her after so many nights of staying progressively later, eventually leaving some clothes there, getting an extra toothbrush, and finally securing her very own drawer in his dresser, to move in. They’d talked about marriage and gosh, she thought, I can save money, we can be together more often, no more hassle of going back and forth…sweet!
Rose colored, arrogant, there’s no way this could get any better glasses have been donned. But they’re a fad!
I asked her about all the stats that reveal the high likelihood that they would get divorced.
Huh?! Not us. We’ve talked about stuff, we love each other, I’ve got friends who are happily married and lived together first. We’re committed-we’ll be fine.
Arrogant. I don’t mean in the outright sense. But unaware. Her way is the right way.
The scientific method is used to combat the very nature of this problem! We design experiments not to prove that we’re right but to show also that our hypotheses, theories, guesses, and decisions could legitimately be wrong. How often does anyone try to punch holes in their own theories though? Justifying their behaviors seems a heck of a lot easier. But by facing reality don’t we gain a whole lot more? Opportunity to weigh the pros and cons. The chance to learn and grow through some obstacles and oftentimes prevent disaster from occurring.

Some quotes to get you thinking about how often you’re pulling the wool over your own eyes.  Time to be the analyst of your own motives and behavior!

Arrogance diminishes wisdom

When men are most sure and arrogant they are commonly most mistaken, giving views to passion without that proper deliberation which alone can secure them from the grossest absurdities
David Hume
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