Content Speaks; Process Breathes

18 May

Sometimes we can get so caught up in the content of something, we completely miss the process.

Ever notice how the worst of your arguments with friends, family members, or loved ones are often due to the words you’re taking personally?

In the heat of the moment you’re past the point of being able to see through the words and into what’s underneath them, but it’s exactly that which holds the key to understanding what is happening between the two of you.

On American Idol tonight Lauren missed the modulation.  She demonstrated exactly the opposite of what I’m addressing here! She was so caught up in the emotion of the song, something struck her so deeply while she was singing, that she lost her place. She missed the key change!  Hearing the music brought her back.

There is someone in my life who makes decisions based solely on how he is going to look and what he thinks people will believe about him. When questioned, he’ll give the answer he believes everyone wants to hear. His superficiality is ugly. I just want to peel through the layers of filth that have built up and expose fresh and vulnerable skin. Because I want to see and be around and experience that person, but also so he can too.  It’s the content that he cannot move past.  And it’s the process that will expose the “being” in the human.

No psychobabble here. It’s not complicated psychology. It’s what creates the ability for humans to establish real, genuine connection. How do you know your best friend is your best friend? What do you feel around this person?

Think this week about your process. Are you really listening? Digging and extracting the meaning? Not only of what others are conveying to you but of your own behavior. Are you honoring who they are?  Who you are?

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